To the Ex-Friend // To Someone // A Prayer
By: Laurel Reynolds
I don’t think I believe in a god but in the last four years,
I have prayed three times. Twice for your family.
I swear your bed was Holy.
Covers consumed us & sifted sins away.
Now, I turn my grey pillow black & try not to blame the
linens, or you, or the good memories
that are starting to rot. I whisper your name &
Hope it lands somewhere soft. Sometimes, it tastes
like a curse. I wonder where you let my name
Remember when we watched bubbles fall in ugly sweaters &
sang Hallelujah in harmony as our tears washed away into
soapy suds? I tried singing hallelujah yesterday & every
note fell flat, felt dirty, tasted wrong.
This was more than a minor fall. Everything between us is
cold & broken. Our faith in each other was strong,
but we needed proof. I still haven’t forgiven
Either of us for breaking the vow of forever. I miss you,
Even though I haven’t forgiven you.
I miss you.
When we were friends, you showed me the
World through a kaleidoscope. Now, even stained glass is
dull. I smudge my glasses & pretend I haven’t been
lonely & longing for months. But I can’t
keep returning to cracked pews. Won’t splinter myself
to make you bigger. I don’t think I believe in a god,
but this is a prayer to someone. To be able to whisper your name &
hope it lands somewhere soft. To not pick it up.
First Published at TruArtSpeaks