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  • Writer's pictureLaurel Reynolds

To the Ex-Friend // To Someone // A Prayer

By: Laurel Reynolds

Image created by WOMBO

I don’t think I believe in a god but in the last four years,

I have prayed three times. Twice for your family.

I swear your bed was Holy.

Covers consumed us & sifted sins away.

Now, I turn my grey pillow black & try not to blame the

linens, or you, or the good memories

that are starting to rot. I whisper your name &

Hope it lands somewhere soft. Sometimes, it tastes

like a curse. I wonder where you let my name


Remember when we watched bubbles fall in ugly sweaters &

sang Hallelujah in harmony as our tears washed away into

soapy suds? I tried singing hallelujah yesterday & every

note fell flat, felt dirty, tasted wrong.

This was more than a minor fall. Everything between us is

cold & broken. Our faith in each other was strong,

but we needed proof. I still haven’t forgiven

Either of us for breaking the vow of forever. I miss you,

Even though I haven’t forgiven you.

I miss you.

When we were friends, you showed me the

World through a kaleidoscope. Now, even stained glass is

dull. I smudge my glasses & pretend I haven’t been

lonely & longing for months. But I can’t

keep returning to cracked pews. Won’t splinter myself

to make you bigger. I don’t think I believe in a god,

but this is a prayer to someone. To be able to whisper your name &

hope it lands somewhere soft. To not pick it up.

First Published at TruArtSpeaks

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